10) No matter how big and strong the child Mike's still kinda scary; He drives a van and always has some candy, enough said there...
9) He looks way too much like Davenport's mascot
8) No left over german dogs at the concession stand after the game
7) He’s an Internet site oporater and sending letters and such through the air hundreds of miles has to be the devil’s dark magic
6) Liberal Vancouver media bias
5) Due to a few accidents with farm equipment most Readen linemen have to remove a shoe to count to their #4 ranking in the preps poll (though I've heard they stay academically eligible because of getting extra credit for it)
4) For taking the concept of "grain fed" too far
3) He comes from Pennsylvania and the necks don't like foreigners
2) For his exposé on Readan's use of biscuits and grave as a performance enhancing substance
And the #1 reason Reardan's linemen don like Mike: He's rightly going to put the Mary Walker Chargers at #1 in the preseason preps football poll! Whoo Whoo GO CHARGERS!!!!!
Posted on 6/2 2:41 PM | IP: Logged
10. They are big enough to take the White House back from Cheney.
9. Their current approval rating is 10 points higher than Bush's, even at DeSales.
8. They think Condoleezza Rice is a side dish on Taco night.
7. The OVAL office is the same shape as their heads.
6. Their tough stance on immigration would virtually shut down Davenport’s field goal game.
5. Carl Rove Out - Larry the Cable Guy In.
4. More intellectual topic options for campaign debates.
3. They have been engaged in critical thinking and much debate over Row vs. Wade for years at Lake Reardan. They are of the opinion that rowing just makes more sense (hard to find 4x waders).
2. Reardan linemen can go on 2.
1. The best reason why Reardan linemen should be President, they'll finally get a highly recognized ring that they don't already have several of.
Oh Ya, Mike W for Press Secretary, way more seasoned in fierce debate and defending wrong thinking than Tony Snow.
col-pulster for Secretary of Health & Human Services, maybe a library, barber, or indoor plumbing in Springdale's future????? Peace Out!!!!
Posted on 6/12 3:55 PM | IP: Logged
If you put the plumbing indoors then you got this big hole in the floor that the kids can fall in. Besides, most ceilings aren't high enough for the bucket crank. I'm not even going to talk about the reason the outhouse is OUT side, Peeeeew-U! You’d think even a Kettle guy could figure that one out!
Posted on 6/13 9:28 AM | IP: Logged
My bad, I had no idea there was flooring in the "dale", looks like dirt & sawdust from the road. Ya see, beein from KF I have this whole other set of standards that I take for granted when traveling around the less fortunate communities. I've got to slow down, take some time, and smell the knapweed a little more often.
I'm statrin today, will report back.
Posted on 6/13 2:27 PM | IP: Logged
"Some folks have saw toothed log walls, Have no windows in at all, A sandstone chimney, bunch'n floor Clapboard roof and a battened door.
When they go to meeting guess what they wear Their old brown coat more patch than tear Their old cotton sox yee wear thee around With an old straw hat more brim than crown." 19th Century Ozark Mountain Song ‘Arkansas Boys’
I should think that being from Kettle one would have more "taste" than to poke fun of the plumbing, or lack there of, of those higher up the Valley's water table.
Posted on 6/13 4:40 PM | IP: Logged
Posted on 6/13 4:52 PM | IP: Logged
I hope it’s just interference from you hub cap lookin belt buckle or the wheel weights where your teeth should be that’s throwing your compass off. Ya see, in suspenders and dentures my compass shows the “dale’ to be south or down stream from good ‘ol KF. If I’m wrong though I have no doubt that the tailings pile at Addy will neutralize anything you could flush our way should plumbing become an option.
It’s rodeo weekend in Colville. Could be like a family reunion. All those boys and girls with their buckles like yours just a dancing away, I’ll be in dark glasses just from the spark flash. YeeHaaw………
Posted on 6/15 9:13 AM | IP: Logged
"compass shows the “dale’ to be south or down stream from good ‘ol KF."
LOLOLOLOL; ROTFLMFAO, you have to be'a funn'n me or maybe you really did graduminate from the Ghetto Falls. You do realize that Springdale sits at one end of the valley and Kettle at the other but despite being south is at the higher elevation end of the valley. Ain't kidd'n ya here, go look the mighty Colville River, it flows WNW meaning that Colville is up stream from Kettle, Chewelah's up stream from Colville and Sprindale is up stream from Chewelah. Despite 'gravity hill' on the Onion Creek road most of the valley abides by the laws of physics which means that Kettle is down stream from 95% of the valley. As is shown by water starting at Loon Lake, flowing through Springdale down Sheep Creek into the Colville River then past Kettle to Lake Roosevelt. How else do you think it's possible for the rest of the valley give Kettle so much crap?
Only a Kettle grad would try and measure elevation with a compass... "We use less gas go’n to Spokane then a come'n home cuz its South of us and we can put'er in neutral and cost!" Let me guess, you're the geography teacher at KFHS? But the funniest part is it took you half a week to figure out by your compass that Springdale was south of Kettle.
And I'm getting belt buckle insults from a man who considers his "Jr" belt buck a family heirloom?
How can you that someone is from Kettle? They describe chicken as tasting a lot like squirrel.
Posted on 6/19 4:30 PM | IP: Logged
Just like all civilized people, animals, and especially athletes, the "surface water" does run from Springdale, and unfortunately like the athletes ends up in Kettle Falls. But you kind sir were referring to the "water table" which I'm happy to alert you lies below the ground. Now I am very sympathetic to the fact that you would not be aware of much that goes on below you given the fact that between your belly and your buckle (1980 muttin bustin champ) you probably haven't even seen your feet in years let alone understand anything that goes on below them.
So, pay close attention and take notes. The water table known as the "Can Empire" aquifer originates under what was once a glacier at the north end of Christina Lake BC. From there is follows a path down the Kettle River Valley continuing south through the Colville River Valley directly under the Dale then south to Airway Heights where it connects to the Spokane aquifer. As a surface sipper from the dale I don't expect you will have a need to know the trivial details, but don't you ever wonder why the water tastes a little "familiar". See even up here in the Ghetto we are utilizing this little wonder called well drilling that keeps us from essentially drinking out own body water. But hey, more power to you and the Dale water quality team for your recycling efforts. Remember pulster when you were just a little hicker in the Dale Jr Hi and they sent you home with that sample bottle for the science class? Well, long story short, if you hadn't used that bottle for booger storage and actually taken it back with some home town water in it, the Red Cross would have shown up and your life would have changed dramatically. It bbbbbreaks my little hhhhheart to think that you could be going through life without that vicious sssstutter and nervous twitch down your left side. But hey, when take your annual shopping vacation to Tijuana, I bet you just drink what ever you want. One less thing to worry about.
Now that we're water savy, what about football? It's camp week at KF, should be a who's who of local talent. Any chance you'll be makin it? The fresh air and the "clean" water might be good for your malaria. If you do, be sure to let me know so we can tail gate a little during useless skills drills. Ttttake care man....
Posted on 6/19 8:46 PM | IP: Logged
Colfax will go, I expect, to Boise St.’s camp, that’s where they usually go and Pullman generally holds their own camp in Pullman though many also go to the Cougar camp. I haven’t even driven through Springdale in 17 years and haven’t lived there since 1980; my guess is no team camp at all for the Mighty Chargers.
As for Kettle Falls’ ability to teach valuable research skills:
The Colville Valley hydrogeologic unit includes two and only two aquifers, the upper outwash aquifer and the lower aquifer.
"The upper outwash aquifer is present mostly in the stream valleys and terraces that are tributary to the Colville River. Average thickness of the unit is 100ft. The unit is thickest in tributary valleys on the east side of the Colville River Valley, greater than 300 ft thick in areas along the little Pend Oreille River in Sand Canyon, along Cottonwood Creek and between Deer and Loon Lakes."...
"The lower aquifer consists of sand and gravel and likely is continuous along the length of the Colville River valley and Echo Valley. It is present below the Colville Valley confining unit and above the bedrock. In most of the study area, the lower aquifer is confined and many wells completed in this unit flow at land surface. The aquifer is unconfined where exposed to land surface along the Colville River downstream of Meyers Falls. The estimated average thickness of the unit is 60ft. This may be an underestimate of thickness, however, because few wells fully penetrate the total thickness of the unit. On the basis of available drilling records and water levels, parts of the lower aquifer extend to the mouth of the watershed and discharge into Lake Roosevelt, probably diverging around the bedrock high near Myers Falls- to the north of Kettle Falls and to the south beneath the present drainage of the Colville River."...
"Recharge: The upper outwash aquifer is recharged by direct precipitation in the form of rain and snow, by seepage from lakes and by losses from streams overlying the aquifer. Recharge to the lower aquifer likely occurs in several areas. Water-level data indicate that recharge to the lower aquifer occurs from the southern extent of the watershed to about 3 mi. north of Springdale, where vertical head gradients generally are downward. Local recharge also may occur along the walls of the Colville River valley, where coarse talus or glacial or alluvial outwash fans overlie and possibly interfinger with the otherwise continuous Colville Valley confining unit."...
"At the outlet of the Colville River watershed, near Kettle Falls,...Along the valley floor, water-level altitudes within the lower aquifer range from 1,895 ft near Springdale to 1,284 ft near Kettle Falls."..."The ground-water divide for the lower aquifer is uncertain, but may be near the surface-water divide for the watershed near Springdale."
In short: "Lateral flow of water in the aquifers generally mimics the surface-water drainage patter of the watershed."
I spent 5 minutes making up my rhetoric with a wireless laptop in a hammock while over looking the river with my trusty lab dropping a slimy ball in my lap. It was a real toss up for me to spend the time trying to convince you that you were all wet, or handle the slimey ball for a while. I chose to put the effort into BSing you only because my hands were finally dry from earlier throws.
You on the other hand must have done some hefty home work. This has me worried for you. If you had this info on the tip of your lobes them I'm even more worried. I gotta ask pulster; do you live in the basement of your mothers house? Do you have a killer Star Trek collection? Do you eat your cereal (Fruity Pebbles) being fed with an erector set on remote control. This is a treatable condition. It's actually not all that uncommon based on time spent in the dale for you to be a shut in info junky. I'm here to tell you though that there is a lot more in life for you to look forward to than brainiac whipping on poor Kettle guys.
I want you to slide your mechanical pencil out of your pocket protector and along with your slide rule underline the following programs in your well use TV Guide.
Well, that’s probably going to keep you for a few days, I 'll get you the rest of the list on Monday. Drink lots of fluids and let your self go, it's ok to express your self in a non-informational way. Now promise me your gonna leave the encyclopedias on the shelf and no dissertations for the entire weekend. Most important of all, remember your daily affirmation from camp infoaholic: "I'm Good Enough, I'm Smart Enough, and Doggone It, People Like Me"! Hang Loose Bro....
Posted on 6/22 7:59 PM | IP: Logged
You spent longer on the BS story then I did shooting it down.Step 1) google "Colville Valley Aquifer".
Step 2) pick an address mentioning USGS or a .gov suffix. Or some other thing that isn't going to pull up a porn site
Step 3) quickly brows the text until you hit on key words or concepts you're looking for.
Step 4) cut and paste any information you want including the reference
Step 5) hit the "post" key
Step 5 & 1/2) pop open a cold one cuz your work is done.
Ten minutes and all the hicks think you spent hours of research and such. With your large waist and small hat size maybe you should just stick to Hotdog Eating Contests, everyone has a skill.